Ever Climbing

I have been walking up one of the most impossibly steep hills I have ever had to conquer in my life this month of March 2010. Not just that but also in a place where I am new and people don't know me as well as they think they might. They trust, I trust. I climb and slip, they slip with me. Why? Why would someone want to slip just to slip? It is today that I have finally gotten to the top of the hill, finally being able to look at the other side of what I have been climbing. Once on top of the hill I want to scream out to all that I think care and share how my life may be able to remain stable. I scream out a jolt of joy and get tears in return. I want to remain stable, I don't want to deal with the negatives just because I can choose to. I am over being sad, dark, confused, and lost. I just want to be solid and never do the emotional tug o war of going from tip top of the mountain on down to the tip of the iceberg, drowning at the lowest point I can find. I want to continue to grow and create and stop having to tie myself up to pole and be paralyzed creatively and in the end, totally. Why did an earthquake have to happen once I thought I finally reached the top getting ready to continue to the next (hopefully not as steep and tall as the last) hill that life has me climb. And instead of being able to have a good brainstorm I got rained on and out. This is something that I refuse to let bring me back to the bottom today. I have worked too hard to get to where I am today, and I don't think you understand the feat that I am about to be done with. How could you? This is the first time you have ever seen me fight. I only wish that this earth was filled with more people who are understanding and full of love. The most emo post on R&Bblog up to this point and I know, I know:

"Cool story, bro."